Graveyard Dreaming
by Her Wickedness
Summary: What happened after Playing with Fire ended? Grissom sends out a special request.


Summery: What happened when Playing with Fire ended? What sparked Sara's confused look in the finale? Read a possible scenario.

Disclaimer: Want 'em... can't have 'em. BAH!

Notes: It has been awhile since I have wrote anything. I had lots of encouragement from a special friend... you know who you are. Thanks. I hope everyone enjoys.

---- 

"Would you like to have dinner with me?"

"No."

"Why not? Lets... lets have dinner, lets see what happens."

"Sara... I don't know what to do about this." 

It had been the first time he acknowledge their pending relationship.

"I do."

He wanted so badly to hear her answers.

"You know, by time you figure it out, it really could be too late."

Grissom felt as if he'd been punched in the gut.

He didn't follow her. He left his office in a slow pace though he seemed anxious to leave once she arrived. With her words clearly affecting him, he said goodnight to a woman passing by. It didn't matter who she was, his mind was too far into Sara's words to realize he had spoken to Terri Miller who had been called in for a day shift matter. Now married, it didn't really matter anyhow. She stopped to watch him, dazed as he headed for the exit. Something in her felt hurt for he wasn't drooling over her. 

His Tahoe was parked closest to the exit and as he looked in the far distance of the lot he saw her turn her alarm off with a simple push of her key chain. He heard nothing and slowly bowed his head at yet another realization of his deteriorating hearing. He wished things were simpler. For her sake not only his. He knew the kind of damage he brought to her heart, and he knew what he could do to stop it. 

He watched her. Admired how she fought the pain and opened the door with her bad hand. She could have as easily used her other hand and he loved the fact that stitches weren't going to interfere with simple tasks. She slammed the door as he continued toward his Tahoe. He sat there for a couple of minutes. Letting her words slip under his skin into his heart. As it flowed through his veins he became angrier with himself at the way he had been handling their continuing growing and complicated relationship. He hadn't lied to her though. He honestly didn't know what to do. He was as confused as she was. 

Their relationship was out of the blue for him, yet when he thought about it he knew he always had feelings for the tall brunette. They had met at a seminar. He was the guest speaker and she was the eager student. She was always looking for a way to impress him. He liked her and trusted her and considered her a friend, though he never got too close to anyone. They stayed in contact after the seminar and she would email him interesting cases that would pass through San Francisco and he would give her insight. 

But when he asked her to come to Vegas to help out his team he knew something had changed. Her ambition was out of control but it solved cases and that was all that mattered. She was constantly trying to impress him. He didn't think much of it. As he watched her work harder and harder he saw something in her change. Either he was only noticing it for the first time or something changed. He tried his hardest to get over his feelings because of the fact he's the supervisor and she is the employee. Still this is something that he struggles with. He has seen the woman inside the criminalist. As her feelings were growing his were getting confused. He wondered if her sincerity was legit or if her wanting to be his favorite was actually working. They had a history, a history that only they could remember. They knew each string that tugged at the others' heart. 

The vibration of his cell phone woke him from his graveyard dreaming, "Grissom." 

"Hey Grissom, its Catherine, I just wanted to fill you in on how Greg is." 

"How is he?" 

"Well he is going to be alright, that's all that matters. He's wondering when you're going to visit him." 

Grissom chuckled as he scratched his nose. He wasn't in the mood for entertaining Greg. All he wanted to do was dedicate the night to figuring out what to do about him and Sara, "I'll probably stop by after a few hours of sleep... long day y'know?" 

"Yeah, alright. I'll catch you later." 

"Yeah." As he hung up the he looked at the clock. He had been sitting in his Tahoe for nearly 15 minutes. The engine turned and he put it in reverse. As he checked for cars he saw Sara putting on her seatbelt. 'Why hadn't she moved?' he thought. He watched her drive off as her words were eating away his soul. 

With his heart going a million miles per hour and his brain going only about the speed of his Tahoe, he decided to follow her. They needed to talk. At the least he needed to reassure her a little more. He wasn't sure if "I don't know what to do about this" filled in some of her blanks. He needed to make sure that even though he wasn't ready, he didn't want to lose her. 

He followed her through a couple of stoplights. Though he knew where she lived he thought it best to arrive as she did. So they could talk in her parking lot without going to her apartment. He knew how weak he was and he knew how strong she was. As she turned towards a different direction he wondered if he was following her to _his_ house. Hank. He had learned from Catherine that their relationship had ended. Though he was happy to hear the news, he felt bad for Sara. And as she kept driving further from her apartment he felt even worse. Had his nonresponse pushed her back toward Hank? He wondered if he kept following her if that would border him a stalker. He only wanted to talk. 

Sara pulled into a dark parking lot. It took awhile for Grissom to realize they were at a park. The same park where they had found a dead body and the same place Sara came alone... in the dark... to find drag marks. It was the last case they worked on together. He remembered it was nice. He wondered why she had come here now as he parked a few rows behind her. He had a clear sight into her Tahoe and saw her cross her arms on the steering wheel. She hung her head in defeat and it hurt him to watch her. He knew she was probably crying and he bowed his own head. He had to do something to ease her fears. 

Her heart was crying so much that it was stealing all her tears. Her eyes were dry and she suddenly felt tired. As if she had been crying all night long. The explosion took a lot out of her and for a moment she wished she had sustained harsher injuries so the pain would warm her from Grissom's cold heart. 

She turned the radio on as she searched for her "Other Men out There CD" in her overhead visor. It included 17 quick-fix songs in which ignorant men were bashed for giving up on a love so easily. Songs from Alanis to Gloria, and even Avril Lavigne's "Losing Grip." 

"Alright all you late night listeners we have a special request from a man so in love he doesn't know what to do. 

"Sara ... with an H... if you are out there.... Graham wants you to know that he is in a complicated situation, which has serious consequences." 

So much for the CD. Sara's heart stopped. She stared at her radio with her jaw dropped and the tear in her eye desperately wanted to catch some air. 

"He says ... if you give him a little more time he will figure out a way you two can be together. He's got mad feelings for you Sarah so.... Give the brotha a shot girl.... Don't move on so soon. Men make love complicated, BUT he wants to uncomplicate it for you, that should say something right? Here is your song Sarah, hope you enjoy and I wish all the best for you and Graham." 

The soft ballad began. Tears rushed from her eyes. What an amazing gesture from a man she didn't think was capable of any meaningful gesture. She laughed at the names he used. When they had met at that conference so long ago she had introduced herself so boldly. 

_"Let me guess... with an H," he had asked. _

"Sorry. No H. Let me guess..." She stared at his 'Dr. G. Grissom' nametag. "Graham Grissom?" 

"Ehhhhhh... I guess we both strike out." 

Sara smiled. They've missed too many balls and struck out too many times when it came to each other. She felt like Barry Bonds ready to knock one out of the park. Ready to run the bases with Grissom.

He watched her as she sat back in her seat as the lyrics flowed through Las Vegas speakers. 

**Did I drive you away? **

I know what you'll say, 

You say, "Oh, sing one we know," 

But I promise you this, 

I'll always look out for you, 

That's what I'll do. 

I say "oh," 

I say "oh." 

My heart is yours, 

It's you that I hold on to, 

That's what I do, 

She felt comforted. 

**And I know I was wrong, **

But I won't let you down, 

Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, 

I say "oh," 

I cry "oh." 

Yeah I saw sparks, 

She wiped her tears and smiled. She did of course curse herself for being so happy. Was he off the hook? Her heart healed a little bit over this song. She loved him for it. 

**Yeah I saw sparks, **

And I saw sparks, 

Yeah I saw sparks, 

Sing it out. 

La, la, la, la, oh 

La, la, la, la, oh 

La, la, la, la, oh 

As the song ended she knew she would be making a pit stop as soon as the Best Buy doors opened. 

Grissom opened his door and stepped out. His eyes never left her as she lost herself in thought. His hands slipped in his pockets as he strolled toward her. He needed to see her. He knew she would be alright but he needed to see her. He didn't want to frighten her by showing up at her window. She would probably pull out her gun and get a round off before he could open his mouth. Instead he called her. 

She saw his name on the caller ID and wiped her eye before another tear could fall. She cleared her throat and answered his call but no words would come out.

"Look out your window." 

She looked straight ahead, eyes searching and then she looked to her left. She saw him walking towards her with one hand in his pocket and the other holding his cell phone. She laughed because she suddenly knew what Alanis meant. She ended the call and got out of her Tahoe just as he walked up to her. She looked at the ground and kicked a cigarette butt to the side. 

His eyes never left her.

The dark park was silent. So was the parking lot.

She crossed her arms and leaned back on the vehicle resting the heel of her right foot on the back tire. He could see she wasn't sure what to say or what was going on.

"Sara," he took a deep breath. "I know there isn't much I can do to make you feel any better and I'm sorry. Just know the time will come where I won't need to make up for anything because I'll dedicate my life to making you happy."

It shocked not only her but him as well. He'd never been so honest before. She looked up and their eyes met. 

"I heard ... the song."

"Did you like it?" He took a step forward and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear, wondering where this surge of courage was coming from.

"Grissom don't." She took a few steps around him as she put some distance between them. He took her spot along the Tahoe and hung his head. "You don't know how confused you make me. And I know that you're being sincere right now... but... You've hurt me for too long. It all can't just disappear in a single song."

"I know. I know. I'm not trying to make it disappear. I'm just trying to ask you to hold on for a little longer so I can figure some things out." He looked down and kicked the same butt, "I don't want to lose you."

She exhaled loudly and almost laughed. "I think I've waited long enough Grissom. My heart is tired of waiting, my mind is tired of waiting, my body is tired of waiting."

"I know I have no right to ask you for more time. I know that. But I don't know what else to do!"

"Forget what ever it is that is holding you back! We can make it through together. _Together_ Grissom! We can hide it from everyone. Is that what you are worried about? You don't think I know what the consequences are? I do know! But I choose you. I choose us!"

Their shouts filled the silent parking lot and frustrated tears rolled down her cheeks. As usual he didn't know what to say.

"Look... do whatever it is you need to do." She was angry. She opened her door and he grabbed her arm. 

"Don't ... dont leave like this."

"Lets just keep our distance. You're good at that remember?" His hands slid down her arm as she pulled it from his grasp. His grip tightened around her fingertips. He didn't want to let her go... but he did. 

He wasn't sure if she was going to wait for him or not.

Then a small smile fought its way past her tears and he knew.

It was a 'goodbye.'


End file.
